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Literature
Fall of Equestria: New Dawn Chapter 4
Aftershock
Twilight sat on the steps of town hall, now a temporary base for Ponyville's liberators, her previously bare chest now covered in Flash's dragon scale leather jacket. There was a whole lot to take in. Shining Armor was leading the rebellion. A rebellion complete with their own mobile suits and flying battleships to counter the Caribou's own. This was... unbelievable. Everything she was seeing now was against everything she'd seen with her own eyes for the last five years. All the while; allied Mobile suits moved through the streets and civilians headed for the huge battleship that had landed outside of town. Shining Armor stepped
Literature
The Friendship Initiative: Prologue
This is a sequel to "The Last Cutie Mark Crusader". You may want to read that first before starting this or risk confusion of coming into the middle of something. I’d like to make a very special thanks to my momma mare and Dashiesplash (fanfiction.net) who have both been an immeasurable source of support on this project. ... Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria... The sun burned brightly overhead, punishing everyone below with its scorching heat. The changeling, Ash Eater, coughed on the cloud of dust that was kicked up as his Shock Force, over half a million timberwolves and tens of thousands of changeling warriors, marched north toward Ponyville. The latest reports from their scouts indicated that the ponies dwindling contingent, their ‘Assault Corps’, was setting up defensive lines to slow the advance. After the defeat they had suffered at Apple Loosa, the ponies were not likely to be baited into holding any position long-term again. Driving toward the nearest
Literature
My Little Pony
My little pony
Skinny and bony
Went to the circus
Farted on purpose
Tripped over a wire
Fell in the fire
My little pony is DEAD
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Dawn nears. Who is left to pick up the pieces?
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Comments23
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Overall Vision Originality Technique ImpactWell, in all actuality, this has been my least favorite chapter so far.
It really felt rushed. All your other chapters have been taking their time, showing everything in nice detail, and now, it's: BOOM, Spike's dead and the battle starts within 20 mins of it.
No time to let the pain seep into everybody's psych or have anybody question what's next. It really felt like you rushed it.
And you know I'm a huge fan of this, so it pains me to give this chapter lower then average marks. Maybe it's because I'm a tad tired, having just read another fanfiction update that clocked in at 16,000 words.
But Cameo getting a suit was awesome (if a tad out of the blue).
Hopefully you understand.
But Spike's last words gave me MAJOR feels, so good work there.